Opinion: Like joke we are in 2020?

Opinion: Like joke we are in 2020?
Source: Rami Baitie | blog.ramitalks.com
Date: 19-01-2020 Time: 12:01:15:pm

Selfies
I am now finally convinced that the dreaded selfie is here to stay. I had hopes, you know, that it might actually pass. The point of no return? I noticed two lecturers (not from my campus) taking a selfie on stage at a graduation ceremony. Truly, in the present day, I suppose there's nothing wrong with that. But something in the recesses of my very dark brain shouted, "Is nothing sacred anymore?!" I get it, I'm old-fashioned. But still, ebei oh!!

Losing Contact
Do you know one of the best catastrophes that ever happened to me? Losing the contacts on my mobile phone. You know, when it happens it feels like the end of the world. Whaaaatttt? I can't call anyone?? It's a terrible situation. But, after losing my contacts about 5 times, I have come to realise that it is actually a good thing. Why? You find out just how good some friends are. Not all your friends of course. But those who you might be in touch with occasionally. People who maybe you thought were closer than they turned out to be.

You see, when you lose contacts, the contacts haven't lost you. And that awareness is what becomes interesting when you observe how long it might take before some people will get in touch. You have lost their number so there's not much you can do. But how long will they take to get in touch with you when they haven't heard from you in a while? I tend to feel it more because of this blog. I send out a teaser every single week. So if the teaser doesn't arrive for a few weeks....surely someone will notice...

Carol Service
So I attended the Achimota School Festival of Nine Lessons and Carols this Christmas (2019). Nice. This time I went with three women, one of whom allowed us to be on time. That meant we caught the very beginning of the show when the lights were dimmed and a soloist sang the first verse of Once In Royal David as the choristers lit their candles. I didn't think I was capable of getting goosebumps in my cynical old age, but I did. Lovely. Only Achimota School, innit?!

The singing was good all evening. Not spectacular, but very solid indeed, both in English and local languages. I was happy about this because the previous Director of the Choir was very good, but he retired, and I was concerned about the new direction the choir might take. There was an instrumental session again this year, by the orchestra. It was executed competently enough, but I just don't get it. Instrumental music at a Carol Service?? And why was the person from OAA 88 who read a lesson so reluctant to smile while he was standing at the pulpit? Ebei oh! How difficult can it be to smile small?? And why did he sound like a stilted Nigerian??

Wedding
Speaking of Achimota School, I read a lesson at a wedding held at the Aggrey Chapel. I entered Achimota School in 1976, and it is only now, in 2020, that I have looked out over the Chapel from the front, under the cross. Seems strange....but I'm not sure why. Strange scene as well; I don't think I recognised one face from up there. The bride had spectacular legs, and she hid them all under a wedding dress. Why? Aren't short wedding gowns acceptable? After all, I was wearing brand new shoes and everyone could see them. 

Black Friday
So, Black Friday has arrived in Ghana. Did you see the number of adverts in the newspapers last year (2019)? Wow! It seemed like everything under the sun was being advertised! Personally, I didn't get involved. But I did go into the local branch of a chain, and it was packed! Eish! No be small oh! This was around 5:30 pm, and the first inkling I had about what was going on was when the staff in a competitor across the road were staring at the chain and making comments about how full the car park was.

I had already planned to pass by the chain for a couple of things I usually purchase from there. Let's just say I stayed longer and bought more than I normally would have! My first success was actually getting a shopping trolley! You couldn't find one for love or money! Many thanks to the lovely Charity for feeling sorry for me. And many apologies to the woman I was not able to pass my trolley on to because it was snatched away as soon as I emptied it! And I mean snatched! I turned to pay at the counter, and before I could say Jack (or Jill) the trolley was gone! Shopping wars!

Staff at the chain told me later on in the week that even though they normally close shop at 10 pm, they shut the doors at 9 pm that night. And yet people inside the shop only stopped shopping at midnight when the system reverted to the old prices! Eish!! Even then the last customer left around 1am!

And that family who were on their way to a Friday evening church service, but diverted course to the chain when they heard about the sale....hmmmmmm!!!!! Shopping is sweeter than praying, I swear!! Are we really supposed to wait one year for the next Black Friday??

Sirens
As you might have noticed, one thing our police are very good at is the use of sirens in traffic. Can someone please explain why this is necessary in a churchyard? The other day I was enjoying a pleasant Friday morning Mass when a funeral procession entered the churchyard. Why did the siren of the police vehicle leading the procession stay on after they had entered the churchyard? And it seemed to be extra loud. Surely the whole point of a siren is to pave the way of the procession through traffic. Once you've entered the churchyard, where there is no traffic by the way, why keep the siren on? In God's own car park?? Nonsense.

Forrest Gump
Forrest Gump is one of the most beautiful movies ever made. The story of a simpleton who makes his way through history commenting on and participating in random acts in history (accidentally) is a social commentary and also tragically funny. It is full of memorable lines and is so heartwarming you feel the need to jump onscreen and hug Forrest. Forrest wins the American Congressional Medal of Honour while serving in the army, becomes a gazillionaire through catching shrimp, shows Elvis Presley how to dance, and cuts the grass on a mower for fun. Forrest Gump perfectly illustrates the saying: "Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you're gonna get." Now, where have I heard that before?

A Ghanaian Mechanic
Fun fact: I got hugged by a Ghanaian mechanic the other day. It's not a normal occurrence for me, hence my mentioning of this wondrous achievement. I was purchasing a used car tyre and I was being shown the options. When a price was mentioned I exclaimed at how much it was. Truthfully it was a good price, but you know how it is: you need to bargain.

Bargain we did until I suddenly lapsed into Fante. A measure of last resort that ALWAYS works. The mechanic standing closest to me spontaneously reached out and hugged me while shouting that I spoke Fante! It was the sweetest thing ever! Average Ghanaians are not great huggers! I was so surprised that I didn't hug him back, which I always think is a bit rude. This hug quite made my day, I have to say. I stayed hugged till I went to bed that night! And, I did get a slight discount...

Heel Ramps
Ladies, would it help if you had a special ramp placed around buildings for those of you in high heels? After all, we have ramps to help wheelchair access, don't we? The thought occurred to me when I followed a couple of ladies up a ramp into a building. There were actually no stairs and I wondered if they were more comfortable using a ramp. The way I see some women struggle when they wear high heels....they should let us know oh!