It breaks my heart to write this. Only years of learning to be tough have prevented me from tearing up as I type.

And in the words of one of my favourite singers, “they say that time's supposed to heal ya - But I ain't done much healing” – Adele.

It was the last second of the 120-minute game. And for everyone who knew the history of Black Stars and penalties, we knew it was all or nothing when Baby Jet stood behind that ball staring at Fernando Muslera.

One kick and Ghana would have made history; the first African team in the last four.

Alas! It was not to happen. The record set that night was I shed my first tears because of the beautiful game, the game we love; the BEST GAME, Our, Game.

It would not be the last but that’s a different story.

The spot kick flew from Gyan’s foot and as though we’d shout Goal, our glottides remained shut as the Jabulani hit the cross bar and went off the pitch.

The pain would never go away 😪
I always admired how Asamoah Gyan handled the bashing...never his fault pic.twitter.com/BcEzjWUIxB

— Oswald=🧑🏾‍🦱 (@oswaldazumah) July 2, 2020

A little back up, perhaps

It was a Fifa World Cup Quarterfinal game and Ghana was holding the superior Uruguay to a 1-1 Draw right to the last five seconds of the game and the Black Stars were on the verge of dismissing the South Americans.

But Suarez, with his evil or holy hands, depends of which continent you are from, stopped an Adiyah header right on the goal line or did it actually cross?

What if there was goal line technology then? Or what if there was VAR? What if Suarez had done the honourable thing?

He was dismissed from the game for his foul move and Ghana awarded the penalty which brings us to where I left off.

What if Gyan kicked the ball 1milimetre lower? Or what if it still hit the cross bar but came back onto the pitch, allowing a quick rebound?

The torture of these questions have kept the best of us awake for lots of nights in the past decade.

I so admire Gyan when he went ahead to take the first kick in the shoot outs; scoring this time.

No serious being blames him for that loss, after all we reach that level owing to his goal in the Round of 16 against the US.

There is no one to blame but the pain lives on. What if the Black Stars were good in spot kicks?

These questions would linger on; making July 2 a non-forgettable day.