Audio By Carbonatix
Three years after he slapped comedian Chris Rock on stage at the Oscars, Will Smith says making a mistake so publicly was "brutal".
"The last few years for me have been really deep reflection," the actor tells 1Xtra's Remi Burgz.
"After the Oscars, I shut it down for a minute and really went into the internal work and just taking a big, strong, honest look at myself."
Will was banned from the awards ceremony for 10 years after he hit the comedian for joking about his wife's shaved head - a result of alopecia, a hair loss condition.
"For the first time in my career, [I was] having to deal with a level of disapproval that I never had to experience," Will says.
"The addiction to the approval of others that I had to dissolve, it was brutal."

At the 2022 ceremony in Los Angeles, Chris Rock mocked Will's wife Jada's appearance.
Clips showing Will immediately marching on stage and slapping him across the face and telling him to keep his wife's name out of his mouth have been viewed millions of times online.
Will resigned from the Oscars Academy shortly after, saying his actions were "shocking, painful, and inexcusable".
The 56-year-old tells 1Xtra the fallout has also given him the time to reflect.
"It was just like there was a manhole cover over some unexplored areas and the manhole cover came off," he says.
"It was scary for a minute what was in there.
"But then all of a sudden, all these new thoughts, new energies, new creativity came through like a geyser, and it started showing up as music."
'Scared to say'
Earlier this year, Will released his first album in 20 years, Based On A True Story, and tells 1Xtra he asked for advice before heading back to the studio.
"When I started writing, I called Jay Z and I called Kendrick," he says.
"Kendrick said you have to say those things you've always been scared to say, and Jay Z said don't even go near it if you're not trying to tell the truth."
The new music hasn't been a hit with critics. Pitchfork said it was "excruciatingly corny" while Rolling Stone described it as "cringey... clunky and dated" in a two-and-a-half-star review.
But Will says it was a "fun way to express the madness of what goes on in my head".
"It is the exploration of what I call the 'despicable prisoners'.
"It's the parts of myself that have been banished, the parts of myself I'm not allowed to talk about on the radio, the part of myself I'm not even allowed to acknowledge is real.
"Working in that space of authenticity, honesty and imperfection, allowing that to grow into a higher perfection than the imagery of Will Smith is where I am as an artist and as a human right now."
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