When you’re in a relationship, your world can get a little smaller. Suddenly it’s not just you anymore. Your plans and your entire future now may have another person in them. It’s an exciting time to be in love.
The world seems somehow newer, brighter even. Though nothing else has changed in your life.
It’s nothing terrible, but being in love generally means you only get googly eyes for one person and ignore the rest of the pack. It’s sweet, it’s Insta-worthy and it’s kind of hard to give up.
One of the hardest parts about breaking up is adjusting to life as a single person. Trading in the daily cute lunch dates for eating Chipotle in front of your computer, and switching the cuddling in bed for passing out alone after a bottle of wine. You’re also mourning a person, in a way. Hopefully, they’re no longer in your life so that you can heal and move on properly.
But you have lost someone, in a way. And it’s not just a person you lose either. You lost the future you thought you were gonna have.
Maybe you even had to lose some friends because the memories were too hard. It’s okay to take the time and heal from all that you’ve lost.
And by far the weirdest adjustment you make after getting out of a long-term relationship is dating, like, other people.
I know it sounds scary and awful and like a bunch of sweaty dudes who just want to get in your pants while also calling you “bro”, but I promise it isn’t.
It actually gets to be pretty fun if you do it right. It’s crucial that you and the other people you date are on the same page about what you’re looking for. It’s also important that you only date people who are able to communicate with you.
And I know it feels like your ex was the best thing ever and he was the only guy for you, but I promise he isn’t.
Life is about change, weird, terrifying change. And if the only thing keeping your single ass at home is the idea that “all the good ones are taken,” then you’re lying to yourself.
Everything feels so permanent at the moment, but it’s not. Everything — and everyone — is temporary.
So rather than hold on to the idea that your ex was the one who got away, start living with the mindset that even people are replaceable.
Your happiness does not depend on anybody but you. No matter what happens, no matter who enters or leaves your life, you will be okay.
You, your heart, and your soul are the only things you have that are truly irreplaceable.
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