Overview Raising one or more children with an absent father poses many challenges for a single mother. Perhaps one of the biggest challenges is when the child begins asking questions about his father. Some situations make answering the questions a little easier, but there is no perfect way to answer questions about a father who isn't around. Follow a few basic guidelines and take your child's age and personality into consideration before you offer information. Step 1 Answer your child's questions as honestly as you can without hurting his feelings or damaging his self-esteem. Telling lies just to smooth the situation over may come back to haunt you if the child and his father have a relationship in the future. Step 2 Modify your responses based on the reason for the father's absenteeism. If he is in prison or has passed away, you can tell your child that he wishes he could be there, but reasons beyond his control are keeping him away. Step 3 Tell your child that her father's decision not to be in her life has nothing to do with her, if he is choosing not to be a part of her life. Let her know he was too young at the time she was born or has other issues he must deal with, so she understands that his absence has nothing to do with her. Step 4 Refrain from sharing any negative thoughts or opinions about the child's father with the child. Badmouthing him won't improve the situation, and it may affect any possible future relationship your child has with his father.