First off, the things we don’t notice: if your nails are chipping, your elbows are dry, or you have an ingrown hair somewhere along your bikini line. These are details that generally sail right past us. We’re more inclined to notice the big-picture behaviors that give us clues about whether we have serious chemistry. Are the sparks flying? Are we turning you on? Are you genuinely excited to be naked right now? These questions are important to men, and here’s what we look for to find answers.

1. Your Initiative
If we’re doing all the work and you’re just sort of hanging out to see what’s going to happen next, we’re going to think you’re not all that interested. So show a little excitement, eh? Take the lead in unbuckling or unclasping something. Roll us over, and get on top. Help us make this moment awesome.

2. The Way Your Body Moves
If you’re stiff, it puts a chill on the moment. We wonder if there’s a problem or if you’re feeling self-conscious. But if you’re revved up and sensual, that turns us on. We want to feel your body writhe against us. We want your chest to press against ours, to feel your thigh slide up between ours. The more you engage your entire body in the moment, the more we feel like you’re excited to be with us.

3. Your Eyes
Are you looking deeply into ours? Are you checking out our freshly naked bodies? Both options are good. What makes us uncomfortable is if you’re looking down (are you having doubts?), checking out your own body (feeling self-conscious?), or gazing off to the wall or ceiling (just bored?). So make sure your eyes aren’t telling us something you don’t want them to. Let us know you’re pumped to be here with us.

4. Your Breath
No, I’m not talking about whether it stinks (although—let’s hope it doesn't!). I’m talking about how it sounds. Is it heavier than usual? Similarly, is your voice deeper? These clues tell us whether you’re genuinely aroused. You don’t need to play it up by panting like you just ran a 5-K or trying to mimic the deeper notes on an organ. But if you’re getting into it, let it show. Let us feel your breath against our neck, whisper something sexy into our ear, let us know you can’t wait for what’s about to happen. Our arousal feeds off of yours, so don’t be afraid to be visibly turned on.

5. If You’re Freshly Waxed or Wearing Expensive Lingerie
Hey—no judgment if you're not. But the prep work implies that you were thinking about sex, and we’re all for that. After all, so were we. Glad we’re on the same page here!