It's Friday. Seven days from Bronya! And we've had a brilliant week! Let's hit the Highlights:

This week, we heard that the EU was accusing the Ghana government ofmassive payroll corruption due to all those ghosts we have been paying salaries to. This had far reaching implications, because there has been an ongoing debate in the British parliament, were the ruling Conservative party has been suggesting that foreign aid should not be exempt from their budget cuts. Of course, the British contribute a large portion of the EU aid, which is sent here for us to pay our ghosts. 

In a year when British citizens are being asked to tighten their belts and suffer massive cuts to their healthcare, education, housing and social welfare budgets, I'm sure you can imagine how angry they will be to discover that over a quarter of a billion pounds of their grudgingly paid-paid tax is being used by the Government of Ghana to pay salaries to people who do not exist. 

But you know, I've got to hand it to Ghanaian ghosts. They sure are a resilient bunch. they don't let an obstacle as small as their non-existence stop them from chopping these salaries every month without fail. 

Also this week, the President ended his "Dumsor Promises" series and started his "Economic-Woes-Will-End-Next-Year" series. Judging by how the Dumsor one went, I'm sure we can expect an exciting package of constant reassurances and postponed deadlines, which will last throughout 2015, culminating in a Grand finale where he promises never to promise again. I personally can't wait.

Oh, and Sonny Badu reminded the Ghanaian Police that the only crime that warrants punishment in Ghana is armed robbery. All other crimes are to be forgiven immediately by the law. In other words, 

If he ain't Ataa Ayi,
Set him free.
After all, it's only wee
Plus his music dey be
You no dey see?

What else happened this week? Oh yes! After God knows how many years pretending to be HIV positive and deceivinging sympathizers across the globe to donate millions to her cause, Joyce Dzidzor chose this week to tell the world that she has been lying to us all along. But she doesn't think collecting people's money under false pretences is a crime. I can already picture her testimony now:

"Yes Your Honour, I lied about having HIV. Yes your Honour I took people's money. Yes, your honour I convinced women with HIV to take the massive risk of having babies, by using myself as an example even though I was in no position to tell them what to do, since I have never had HIV. 

Yes, I used my lie to leverage funding for a movie, which is available for sale today, your Honour (I have a copy in my bag - buy one get one free), but in spite of all this, I am innocent of any charges, because (you're gonna love this) I DID IT FOR A GOOD REASON! As I'm sure you'll agree, it is only crimes done for a bad reason that should be punished. Plus I have done a lot of good. And as you and the esteemed jury are aware, we don't punish people for breaking the law if they have done good things before. 
I rest my case."

And then a couple of days ago, we heard that the Chief-Of-Staff's office alone had overspent their 2014 budget by about 45 million cedis! That's 7 times the 7 million they were actually allocated in the budget. I wonder if they have exceeded their performance targets seven times over…

45 million cedis! That's the price of about 210 CHPS compounds. That would pay for up to 9 new Community SHSs, according to Okudzeto Ablakwa's mathematics. All of that has passed through the basket of the Chief-of-Staff's office in 2014.

All in all, it has not been a boring week, has it? 

Oh, before I forget: Last week, I visited DCOP Kofi Boakye at the Ashanti Regional Police Command to talk about the great work he has been doing. This week, President Mahama visited DCOP Kofi Boakye at the Ashanti Regional Police Command to talk about the great work he has been doing. Next week, I think I'll go on a Bailiff's Tour of GYEEDA, SUBAH, SADA, the NSS, and the Woyome residence, to ask for our money back.

GOOD MORNING, GHANAFO