Fathers’ Day is Sunday, on the back of that; a Ghanaian playwright has said that it should be an opportunity to reflect on the significance of fathers in the lives of their children.

According to Ebo Whyte, people underestimate the role that fathers play but “the absence of a father can really be traumatic.”

“For years I was just moving like a husk, completely empty when I lost my father before age 15. It took me 15 years to forgive God,” Uncle Ebo Whyte, as he is popularly called, said on Joy FM Super Morning Show, Friday.

“My father was a bundle of contradictions,” he said of his Dad. Although an alcoholic, he always warned us against drinking, he added. 

‘Fathers’ Day’ is the day set aside to honour fathers and celebrate fatherhood, paternal bonds and the influence of fathers in society. 

Ebo Whyte says it should be an opportune moment to reflect on the pain and lack of people who have lost their fathers and help them find answers.

People who lose their fathers for whatever reason, go through several devastations, he said.

Some lose their self-worth and become insecure.

Of such children, he said, they have nobody to look up to in life and none to validate them.

It even affects those in school. They have no motivation to learn as there is nobody to impress with great grades or urge them on to study hard. 

But for others, the situation pushes them to mask their insecurities with work. They become workaholics.

Others rather resort to addictions like drugs and other vices to take their minds from the problem.  

But all hope is not lost, Ebo Whyte assured. 

People with such predicaments must first forgive their fathers for their absence and also seek fatherhood in a mentor. 

According to him, fatherhood is not just biological, it is role play. So the children need somebody to play the role of fathers in their lives.

Celebrating Fathers

Despite the importance of fathers, they are not celebrated much on Father’s Day. This is contrasted with the lavish manner mothers are celebrated on their day.

But Uncle Ebo Whyte says this is not a big deal to fathers. According to him, fathers will not blackmail their children emotionally if they do not celebrate them.

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Ebo Whyte and his children

Letting in on his personal life, Ebo Whyte said he does not have biological children but has several adopted children. Of them, he says they are so dear, he holds them like eggs in his palm. He holds them gently without crushing them.

On how he moulds their lives, the renowned playwright said he will rather not use force and abuse to get them to imbibe good values.

According to him, the door is always opened to them. Those who prefer to stay will continue to be cuddled like eggs but those who choose to leave can go but are free to return at their convenience.

“My children know I do not judge them. I am interested in what you can learn from the situation.”

According to him, it is important that society does not expect too much from kids as it is their formative years. They need time to make their mistakes and to learn from them.

Children of good parents become victims of bad influence because they are forced at home to hold etiquettes of their parents -which they might not believe in. 

He has advised fathers on the best way to approach parenting. “Be you. Let your children see you live well. Be the best example. Don’t be a hypocrite,” he said.