Private legal practitioner, Martin Kpebu has advised spouses in problematic marriages not to seek a divorce if their reasons are not tangible.
According to him, "We just don’t divorce like that."
Martin Kpebu was addressing legal concerns from fervent listeners of Joy FM's Super Morning Show on Tuesday during a segment dubbed "Free Legal Clinic".
Addressing a concern from a listener, Nii, whose wife left home and has been renting her apartment for the past two and half years, and thus has denied him sex all these years, Mr Kpebu said, "The fact the wife has denied him sex for two and half years alone makes it look very dry. We just don’t go to court and say two and a half years; no sex, so give me a divorce."
He said that Nii has to provide further details on efforts to reconcile with his wife since it would be difficult for a lawyer to plead his case based on sex.
"The lawyer would ask, apart from this unfortunate occurrence, what efforts have the two of them made. Even if, let’s say the wife is not interested, has Nii,
1. Reported to the lady’s parents?
2. If she has no parents, her uncle or aunty, the most influential family member in her life or has he taken the matter to the lady’s pastor or employer?"
Mr Kpebu said that Nii must show proof of the extent to which he has taken to reconcile with his wife.
"Because when you go into the court, they don’t just say that no sex for two and half years so divorce. No. There is the phrase that the marriage has broken down beyond reconciliation.
"Let me repeat that the marriage has broken down beyond reconciliation. So the lack of sex is just one aspect of it. It does not determine everything.
"If Nii hasn’t done that, that is what he has to pursue first. Then, when he has tried all these attempts at reconciliation, and they don’t succeed, he would add that to his case. And that one, if he’s seeking a divorce in court, generally, it would be easier for him."
On the same show, another lawyer, Clara Beeri Kasser-Tee, advised Nii to reevaluate his conduct, which might have resulted in his wife moving out of their marital home.
"It depends on Nii. What did you do to let her move out of the house? If Nii, for example, put up unreasonable behaviour which then compelled the wife to move out, he wouldn’t be, in law, to be able to compel the wife. It depends on the other circumstance for example what kind of conduct may have made the woman go out."
She advised married couples always to try to dialogue or get a skilled third party or has expertise in legal marital affairs.
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