Dear Milord,

It’s been two years; the pain still hurts; still haunts me; I moan every dawn from sorrow and I know no amount of therapy or counseling is going to make it go away.

It was just another day on Facebook when I saw your message notification. I normally don’t read messages because of corny pickup lines from predatory men and scammers but there was something different about yours that grabbed my attention and heart.

Your use of the English language was concise, impeccable and the tone very intelligent so I responded and we texted till dawn. I indeed enjoyed every bit of the conversation.

We hit it off and were inseparable from then on. We began dating and it was all jolly and fun. You always gave me a rundown of your daily activities and involved me in all spheres of your life. 

I could hardly put down my phone because I continually anticipated a peep with either a message or video call from you. Our Netflix night dates with ourselves wrapped in warm blankets, convos on our childhood experiences were interesting, and kept us going.

You would restlessly hover around the kitchen when I was cooking your favorite “jollof rice” and romantically massage my neck and shoulder asking “Is it not done yet? I have been starving for a hundred years.”

These got me laughing all the time. It felt so loving and affectionate but little did I know it was all a mirage. I must say you were good at whatever you were up to.

I was head over heels in love but coming events cast their shadows.  You hardly called, you resorted to giving me one-worded responses and craftily gave an excuse when I wanted to come over to your place and vice-versa.

Subsequently, I had a dream which was so detailed that it looked very real. God walked me through your secrets.  When I woke up, it felt like my Guardian Angel was right beside me talking to me, guiding me and led me to your Facebook wall.

I saw a feminine name and typed it in the search bar, then I saw the very woman I saw in my dream wearing the same cloth I saw in my dream. I got startled with the overwhelming happenings as it was so fast and it looked scary.

I clicked on her profile and there it was, she had splayed several wedding pictures for the whole world to see and know that she was yours and you were hers. One could easily realize the aura of love and excitement around you both.

Milord, you were a married man! I fainted and went stark raving mad. When I regained some level of consciousness, I realized I was on a hospital bed and no amount of sedatives could calm me down so I was overdosed to sleep it off.

No blanket could warm the coldness I felt in my soul that night. I wished I would never wake up. The pain and grief were unbearable. Are you that cruel?

I pulled myself together and forwarded your wedding pictures to you and all you could do was worry over your wife getting to know about us. You didn’t give a hoot about me on that sickbed and neither did you care to visit me in the hospital. You kept warning and threatening me on phone not to disclose it to another soul.

Finally, you looked me in the eye and told me you just wanted my womb. Not even as a surrogate to pay me off but you wanted to have a child with me, take the child away and kick me to the curb when you’ve had your way because your wife was barren.

And to think your mother was in it with you all the while. How can a mother and son be this heartless? I thought this happened in movies but look at me.

How could I have allowed myself to be a prey to your evil schemes? A mother who had a daughter my age connived with you to do this to someone’s daughter, me!

You blocked me on your wife’s Facebook page and yours and ceased all forms of communication with me. The house I thought was your home was in reality just one of many and the car one of a fleet you use to deceive gullible women like me looking for love and a man to call their own.

Going back memory lane and with the information I gathered, I’m convinced you deliberately tried impregnating me but God being so good it always coincided with my “safe periods”.

I now understand why you kept asking questions like “Are you fertile? “ I hope you are not on contraceptives” which I found odd but they all make sense now. You were on a devilish agenda.

It’s been two years now, maybe you found another fool to have a child with, maybe you paid a surrogate and now have a child, or fate smiled on your wife and you both have a child now.

You not only disrespected me as a human being but you also humiliated me and desecrated the very essence of my womanhood, you reduced me to nothing with your diabolic act.

You never said sorry or showed any care or remorse for the evil you did to me. I honestly do not wish you well.

You boastfully told me you’ve gotten away with it so I should get over it. But you haven’t gotten away with it. NO! You will never get away with it.

On my birthday I told God that may it not be well with you, your marriage, your household and your entire generation.

I leave it in His hands because He knows the menu which will be best served you.

—Sandra