If you’ve hit these goals, you’re probably in a healthy relationship.

It seems that every couple wants to be “relationship goals.” Women, especially, want others to be envious of their relationship. We want things to look perfect on the surface, even if they’re not underneath. 

However, a relationship is really only valuable if both people involved are getting what they need. It shouldn’t be dependent upon other people’s opinions. No one can truly know what goes on behind closed doors. After all, you know your partner differently than anyone else can.

That being said, there are many couple goals to determine the strength of your relationship.

No matter how you show off your relationship, there’s an unconscious desire to do it the best. But the truth is, what you reveal on the outside doesn’t matter compared to what’s inside. 

Is there as much love as you say there is? Do you really consider your significant other to be your best friend? How do you support each other during the hard times (not just the Instagram-worthy ones)?

Each couple is unique in their own way. And everyone is different in what makes them genuinely happy. So, it’s impossible to know exactly what will work for you and your partner. 

However, I’m currently in a long-term relationship of almost two years and have learned a lot about the stages of relationships. Although they may not necessarily be universal for everyone, the goals you reach as a couple build the foundation of your relationship. 

Here are 5 couple goals some of the strongest couples hit at each stage of their relationship. 

Couple goals to hit in your first 3 months of dating

1. Get to know your partner’s inner ambitions.

Deep conversations at an early stage of dating will give you insight into who they really are. By learning their goals for the future and what brings them joy, you can decide whether or not this is someone you want to spend time with. 

2. Share music tastes.

Music plays a role in everyone’s life to some capacity. It’s important that you can appreciate your partner’s music taste and be comfortable sharing your own. The kind of music someone likes unveils a lot about a person’s attitude. 

3. Meet each other’s friends and family.

Friends and family were there before your new man was and it shows their significance in your life when you introduce him to them (and vice versa). You should know whether or not you’ll get along with each other’s crowd before things get too serious. 

4. Travel for a fun date.

Up until this point, you’ve probably just been doing the movie and dinner dates. But try to spice it up to see how you do in a different atmosphere together. A trip to a nearby amusement park or shopping mall is a great way to incorporate some fun. 

5. Visit your partner’s hometown (if it’s different than your own).

Seeing where your significant other grew up will give you a whole new understanding of who they are. Their surroundings were the foundation that made them special. It’s also exciting to explore a new town and learn where the hotspots were a few years ago. 

Couple goals to hit in your 6 months of dating

1. Take a road trip together.

A road trip will teach you a lot about someone. Plus, it’s always nice to get away with your partner. My boyfriend and I got lucky with a cheap trip to New York City. It was not only fun but taught me a lot about traveling with him. 

2. Go to a sporting event.

While this might not be every couple’s idea of a good time, sporting events are always an option for a unique date. Go see his (or your) favorite team play and discover just how heated he gets if they lose. 

3. Support each other in something you’re working towards.

At this point in your relationship, you should have a pretty good idea of what’s important to your significant other. Take this time to show him how much you support what he’s working for. If he does this for you, it will show you how serious he is about encouraging you. 

4. Work through an argument maturely.

No one likes to fight in a relationship but unfortunately, it’s inevitable. Hopefully, at 6 months you haven’t had too many arguments. But it’s about time that you’ve stumbled upon something that needs genuine understanding and communication

5. Discuss expectations for sex.

Every couple determines their own pace for sex. Maybe you’ve already done it or maybe you are planning to. Regardless, you should be comfortable discussing your (sex)pectations. Always be clear and honest about what you want. 

Couple goals to hit in your 1 year of dating

1. Go on a family vacation together. 

A tropical getaway with the family is a great bonding experience for you and your partner. You’re able to let go of worries and just have fun while getting to know what their family is like on vacation. 

2. Spend some time apart.

It’s very possible that you’ve already done this but if you haven’t, make the conscious effort to spend time without your significant other. It’s important to have your own independence and give them their freedom too. 

3. Enjoy someone else’s wedding together. 

Weddings are a beautiful celebration of love and if you’re lucky enough to attend one with your partner, enjoy every minute of it. Use this night as a way to foster conversation about a future together and dance when you can!

4. See your favorite artist in concert. 

Seeing an artist in concert that you both admire is a fun date, especially when you love the artist because of your partner. Do you always listen to them together? What song do you both play on repeat? Be grateful for the chance to sing your heart out with the one you love. 

5. Celebrate your 1 year anniversary in a big way. 

One year together is a big deal, particularly for young couples. 365 days and 525,600 minutes of waking up each day and saying “I’m in if you’re in.” Maybe you can recreate your first date or go to your favorite restaurant together. Whatever you decide, celebrate this milestone! 

Couple goals to hit in your 2 years of dating

1. Surprise each other with sentiments of your love. 

Even after two years of dating, it’s still important to remind your partner how much you love them. Small surprises expressing your love will be sure to bring joy to the relationship.

I like to stock up on my boyfriend’s favorite foods when he comes to visit — it shows that I think about what will make him happy. 

2. Make decisions that will benefit you both. 

I’m assuming if you’re in this stage, things are rather serious. That being said, it’s okay to think about what’s best for you as a couple. Are you going to take a job because you’re saving for an apartment together? Whatever it is, focus on the future you’re working towards. 

3. Be a part of each other’s accomplishments. 

With my boyfriend recently graduating, I got the opportunity to celebrate his accomplishment. And it felt so good. I was proud of him for the work he put in, but also grateful to be by his side. Two years together allows for total involvement in your partner’s life. 

4. Find joy in simple things. 

While the honeymoon phase and newness of the relationship may be over, there are many ways to keep the love alive. By now, you can appreciate the small things of being in a couple. For example, having someone to watch Ozark with and tell all your friend drama to. 

5. Not needing to be reassured of their love all the time. 

It’s normal to want to be reminded of your partner’s feelings for you. But honestly, you shouldn’t need that all the time. After two years together, you should be confident that your partner loves you and the other way around. At this stage, there’s no more questioning. Only the love you both have for each other — and that’s a beautiful thing.